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For the guys who have been asking the question, "How to meet women?".
- Get a sense of style but don't go to the extreme with it. Always look your best and always have your teeth brushed, etc. You never know when the opportunity will take place so be ready and dressed nice. Wearing your old worn out grungy work clothes out could be enough to ruin your confidence and your chances. Wear a nice pair of pants, nice shoes, and nice shirt.
- Don't be afraid to set your sights high; if you think you're good enough for a girl, she will think you are, too. If you don't think you're good enough for a girl, then she probably won't think so, either. Hence, be confident. This shows other girls that you have good taste and that you're giving them a complement just by talking to them.
- Observe the guys that are getting attention at parties (ladies' attention), and watch the way they keep their interest.
- Relax, you must not overdo a play. Stop presenting yourself, and make her feel like she is presenting herself to you.
- Learn to accept rejection. Rejection is part of the game and being rejected doesn't necessarily mean there's something wrong with you. Repeated rejection, however, does mean there probably is something wrong with you that you need to change.
- Plan on where to hunt. Grocery stores and gyms are great places to meet women. Laundromats are also a possibility. Bars are another place to find single women. Don't go to meet women at loud dance clubs. A nice sports bar is ideal.
- Always be on the prowl. Talk to women wherever you go. It gives you practice and helps overcome the fears of talking to them.
- Smile. Show those pearly whites all day, every day. Smiles are infectious.
- Do not focus on the target first if she is with friends. Make friends with her friends, so they do not think you are just some creep trying to get laid (especially if you are). Then, after you have sufficiently impressed the group, you can start to talk to the target girl.
- Make a connection. Try and find out what this person really loves in the world, and let her tell you all of the things she loves about it. Then, tell her you feel just the same way about some things, but disagree with her opinions on other things. For instance, "Yeah, I really like Van Gogh too, but Monet is much too simplistic." Make her get involved in a conversation.
- If you have your girl off to the side at a party or bar, and there is any period of silence (>3 seconds), remain confident. Showing fear at an awkward moment can hurt your whole credibility.
- Borrow your cute niece or nephew and take them out to the store or mall. Women love a man who is looking after an adorable small child! Most women will smile and ahhh! This is your cue to start a conversation.
- If your lifestyle allows, get a dog or preferably a puppy. Be aware that a dog may live for 10-15 years, and being a highly social animal, will need company and mental stimulation on a daily basis. Also be aware that puppies will become dogs. If you can't keep a dog, you're probably best off borrowing one to take to the park for a walk.
- This how-to works mainly for men and women who are looking for a 'fling'. Long-term relationships that evolve into a marriage/union don't depend as much on material quantities as much as they do on your ability to compromise, communicate, and sacrifice.
- Work on your career. As your success grows, so will your dating pool. Alternately, if you can look like a big shot, then make up a career (steer away from 'accountant' and more towards 'unsigned guitar player')
- Play the numbers. Don't get discouraged by rejection.
- Be patient
- If yourself is too boring, put on something flamboyant that will make you stand out from the other guys.
- Don't assume that good looking women are unapproachable. A woman who is above average is probably sick of men hitting on her. A woman who is way above average, really stunning, probably doesn't get hit on as much. Rejection from a great-looking woman doesn't feel so bad. These women tend to be kinder and more gracious than women who are fed up with all the jerks.
- Read "The Game" by Neil Strauss. It's where all this comes from.
- Stay focused, remember what you're there to do.
- Know when to end the conversation: something like, "You know I would love to hear more but I have to get back to work now. Tell me all about it over salsa dancing on Tuesday." Always leave the conversation to be continued. Do not exhaust the conversation as things can turn awkward and she will lose interest.
- Secretly pay attention to her breathing, If you breathe at the same rate as her she'll feel much closer to you.
- If you have an iPhone, BlackBerry, or other smart phone, consider downloaded an ice breaker application.
- Touch her buttocks softly at the beginning of the date. At time progresses, move up to the small of her back.
- Don't try to laugh a girl into bed.
- Don't get sloppy drunk. This is one of the worst things you can do.
- Don't come on too strong. Have a keen sense of if she's interested or not. Look for signs. If she ever touches your arm, holds your hand, flits her eyes, or laughs at your jokes, you are in.
- Be wary of "you're cute." This is not an indication of interest. Also, if a girl asks you to dance, she is probably just looking for someone to dance with, and this is a negative. If she pulls you off the dance floor to talk, you are in. If she ever tells you "I'll be right back," give up on this one because she's never coming back.
- Don't ever try to 'fit in' or look like the other guys at a party.
- Be smart. Don't let the little head do all the thinking.
- Do not use cheesy pickup techniques like having the bartender or waitress bring a drink over to her. You've got to play it cool and that does not work.
- Never utter the word 'girlfriend'. She will back away so fast that your head will spin.
- Be graceful and never ashamed.
- Do not over analyze the situation. Just make eye contact, smile, say hello, and start an innocent conversation with her just like you would with your guy friends. Do not succumb to paralysis by analysis.
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Things You'll Need
- Conversational skills-know how to engage her interest and keep the conversation flowing, hence establishing common ground within a few minutes.
- A cell phone, it makes it a lot easier to get a phone number by casually handing her your phone after a successful conversation, she will be obliged to type in her phone number! Once this is done tell her "I will ring your cell right now so you will have my number".
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Sources and Citations
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